Aug 10 2008
Throwing Money Away
Yesterday was a friend’s birthday and as a celebration, she asked a few of us girls to tag along with her to Atlantic City. I didn’t want to say no because we don’t often get the chance to hang out (I’m always super busy and she has a really complicated –read: difficult– life), so I ended up saying yes against my best judgement. Turns out there’s a reason I don’t go to casinos often (besides the fact that there isn’t any around here): I have a hard time stopping. This is especially true if I’m winning or at least win something through the day.
I made it a point to leave my credit/debit cards at home so I wouldn’t be tempted to overspend, but I did bring about $200 in cash, just so I could shop a little or have lunch or whatever we felt like doing. My friend, however, wanted to spend most of the time visiting the different casinos and she was having such a difficult day that none of us had the heart to tell her no. So we all ended up winning and then eventually losing pretty much all the money. I came back home about $120 poorer and with nothing to show for it –Not even a happily full stomach, since I’m on a diet. Turns out I have a lot more control when it comes to food than money. I’m totally proud of myself for the first point and totally ashamed about the second. I mean, I’m old enough to know better, right?
I’ve been feeling really guilty about the whole situation today and keep wondering if this is an indication of the lack of control I seem to have over my finances in general. Do I do this often? Spend money when I know I shouldn’t? Save cents here and there and then throw dollars away without giving it a second thought? I need to sit down and deal with these feelings and ideas at some point, but today they just feel a little overwhelming.
4 Responses to “Throwing Money Away”
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I know what you mean. I have been thinking this week about similar spending issues. In today’s economy we all have to tighten the purse strings a little more. The first step is admitting you have a problem. The next is doing something about it. . .I wish you luck on step two.
Thanks. I struggled with the idea of sharing this here because it feels like something really personal, but it’s also something I feel I’m not alone in. It’s not that gambling is a problem for me (I do that maybe once or twice a year), but it’s the idea that I may be putting myself in a bad position by doing things that damage my future. I hope that putting this out there helps make me more aware of what I’m doing and helps me get back in track.
I was in the same position as you and did the same thing. Don’t feel bad. The only difference is I only brought what i felt comfortable with “throwing away”. 20 bucks.
I am a total tight wad, but my fiances likes to splurge. He has gotten better in the last few years (maturity I guess), but he is still the $70 jeans-wearer and I am the $20 jeans-wearer.
I have to say though, I understand it’s harder for him. I have always been a tight wad (I got $100 when I made my first communion at age 8 - I still had it when I was 10). He went from spending his entire paycheck on purchases to having me running our finances.
It’s been an interesting adjustment period. Your post helped me realize though that when he gets a little out of control once in a while, it wasn’t necessarily a conscious decision.